


Running out of time

by Tenebrariae



Category: Mystic Messenger (Video Game)
Genre: A lot of emotional pain ok, Angst, Author is trying to be funny (and is currently failing thank you very much), Because I'm very good at writing that /depressed wink/, Emotional Hurt, F/M, I love these two so much /sobs/, Lost Love, Reset Theory (Mystic Messenger)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-10
Updated: 2017-05-10
Packaged: 2018-10-30 03:17:17
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,608
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10867938
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tenebrariae/pseuds/Tenebrariae
Summary: The half light sweetly caressed Hyun Ryu's features, almost reverently, dimming the otherwise blinding colour of his silver hair and allowing the exhausted actor to finally rest. The bedroom was quiet, the atmosphere was peaceful, the perfect picture of a routine that should've painted a smile on her face and swell her chest with tenderness. But there was nothing more than sorrow in her heart.« I am not ready to go yet » she whispered miserably, her trembling finger brushing over Zen's soft cheek with endless affection.





	Running out of time

**Author's Note:**

> I highly recommend listening to [this](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qlqPk0nNDjE) while reading.

It had been simple at first. Picking up the phone, getting to know them, falling in love. Easy. She didn't know. She didn't know what would happen. 

_Stupid, stupid MC_.  
  
Small fingers slowly grazed the shape of the sleeping man's face at her side, light and trembling like the wings of a butterfly. The half light sweetly caressed Hyun Ryu's features, almost reverently, dimming the otherwise blinding colour of his silver hair and allowing the exhausted actor to finally rest. The bedroom was quiet, the atmosphere was peaceful, the perfect picture of a routine that should've painted a smile on her face and swell her chest with tenderness. But there was nothing more than sorrow in her heart. 

« I am not ready to go yet » she whispered miserably, her trembling finger brushing over Zen's soft cheek with endless affection. 

She quietly played with one of the soft white locks that were scattered on the pillow like roots of a blooming tree, enjoying the smoothness of it. She drew invisible circles over Zen's slightly raising shoulder, tracing down over his arm with intentional slowness and stopping when her fingertips met the curve of his wrist and the back of his hand. His skin was warm, pleasing to the touch, painfully familiar. MC slightly tickled the actor's fingers with her own, her lips twitching in a short lived smile when she noticed how promptly he moved at the touch. Even in his sleep he was reaching out for her. The notion should've sent a tepid chill down her spine, or left a trail of love down her throat, but no, it did nothing but stab her. Knowing it wasn't going to make any of that easier, nor it would have touching him like she was doing and staring at his sleeping form. 

« Stupid MC » she whispered once again, biting her bottom lip to the point of hurting herself. At least the pain was real, something tangible and concrete, a clear sign of her still being there,  _still being with him,_ not terribly far away from his arms. Not yet. 

Unable to step away and masochisticly determined to torture her own heart even more than she already had, MC carefully drifted closer to him. Zen's slow and calm breathing gingerly kissed her face, tickling the messy bangs of hair that were covering her forehead. He was beautiful. There was no denying that. She could but observe him sleep, eyes traveling along his jaw. She remembered the first time she had seen him like it was yesterday (and in a sense, it almost was) – she was standing, nervously waiting at his doorstep, gaze fixed on the painted wooden door in front of her. A moment that she was cursed to experience again and again, like listening to a tape that keeps on rewinding itself, but that never really loses its magic. She had chosen him, _I would always choose him_ , she thought, _in every life_ , and if a part of her was utterly fond of that awareness, the other was also scared and hurt by it. Because choosing him, _loving him_ , was painful. Bittersweet. 

« MC? »

The young woman jolted at the sound of her own name, and promptly lifted her gaze to meet those crimson eyes she fell so madly in love with. He was awake. For how long had he been awake? MC couldn't bring herself to speak, not when there was that much remorse stuck in the middle of her throat, actively preventing her from talking. Zen probably sensed something was wrong, because his hand moved and his fingers quickly and gracefully slipped in between hers. He reassuringly squeezed her hand as he moved in her direction, raising his head just enough to have sufficient space to plant a soft and painfully sweet kiss on her forehead. He lingered there, lips firmly pressed against her skin, and the knot in her stomach did nothing but tighten. His scent enveloped her, light and familiar. She let go of a ragged breath, trying to force herself to calm down, to keep the pain at bay, to not waste these last few _precious_ minutes with him.

« MC...? » he called again, gently, his forehead brushing hers and the tip of her nose touching his.

She knew he was going to ask her if she was alright, if she had been sleeping, if there was something he could do to warm and caress her tired heart, but she also knew she was not going to have it. She used to find comfort in his words, in his endless and maybe sometimes  ridiculous worrying for her, but now… now it only reminded her of how little time they had left. She did the only thing that  made sense, the only thing that would bring her some peace, or at least a quiet before the storm sort of thing. She kissed him. She cupped his face in her trembling hands and dragged him down while also sliding up, so she could meet him half way.  She had kissed him  a countless  number of  times before, in every sort of situation, but these kisses – the ones  they shared  right before she had to leave, right before she had to say goodbye, right before she had to  _start over_ – were the ones that planted themselves in her mind like trees. Unmovable. Unforgettable. Of course they were just kisses for him, just a peck of lips, just the touching of tongues, just the quiet breathing of two people that lovingly stare at each other. But for MC? They were her goodbyes. 

« Jagiya » Zen murmured, his mouth still so close to hers she could feel it move at the rythm of his sweet words « Is everything okay? »

Her fingers slided along his jaw and started to play with his chin, tickling him. He let out a short and sleepy chuckle, the most adorable thing she had heard in days, and she decided she was going to lie. Just for this time -  she always did -. 

« Of course » she managed to reply, but her voice mirrored her feelings and showed Zen a little portion of the  hurricane of thoughts  that  was wreaking havoc in her brain. 

He circled her waist with his strong arms, bringing her closer to his body and to the warmth she was craving. MC pressed her cheek against his chest, sighing softly when he proceeded to gently pass his fingers through her hair. These moments were the ones she could never forget, no matter how hard she tried. They stayed there, in her memories, and there was nothing she or anyone else could ever do about it. It didn't matter how many times she would have to start over, or how many days she would have to live at the side of different people. These sweet, deliciously tender moments, with only the two of them, embracing, kissing, whispering to each other, were something else. She cherished them, held them in her heart like the most precious of jewels. 

« You should go back to sleep » she told him, playing with the hem of his white shirt. She knew he was still sleepy, and she also knew she wanted it to end while they were both sleeping like this. In warmth, in closeness, _loved_. 

« Will you be here when I wake up? » he asked her, breaking her heart. She was fully aware that his question was born out of the simple desire of knowing if she was going to head home before he could stand again, yet it shattered her all the same. 

She tried lying like she had already done, but something prevented her voice from ever coming out of her throat. She closed her eyes for a few seconds, taking a silent deep breath. 

« I love you » she answered, praying it would be enough. 

His crimson eyes, still clouded by sleep, met hers and a bright, proud smile formed on his face. Zen's fingers playfully and carefully brushed against her chin, in the same way hers had done a few moments earlier, and he gently lifted her head. He pressed a sweet kiss on her mouth, breathing quietly through his nose, giving her something worth far beyond what he could possibly imagine. A last kiss. 

« I love you, jagi » he murmured on her lips, sleep once again present in his voice.

She said nothing, content with what she was getting, thinking that yes, it would have been enough. It would have been enough for her to carry on, enough to give her the strenght to start over. He continued to hold her, even as he slowly drifted to sleep, leaving her alone once again. MC sighed, pushing a stray of silver hair from his tired face, caressing him in the process. She waited until his breaths were deep and strong, until she was one hudred percent sure he was away, lost in his dreams, and then she spoke. 

« I'm sorry » her ear came into contact with his chest, and her eyes closed when she heard the intense sound of his heartbeat. « I wish I could tell you... »

She lost track of what she was going to say, feeling sleepy herself. She let the sound of his heart lull her, and for a moment, for a sweet and single moment, she was just a young woman lost in the embrace of the man she loved. Tears prickled her eyes, but they did not fall. 

« I ran out of time » she whispered at last, her consciousness quietly drifting away « I always run out of time »

She fell into darkness, and so it ended. 

 

_  
...Hello?…_

_?_

_Can you see this?_

_Yes, I can._

**Author's Note:**

> My second attempt at writing in English *is sweating profusely*. Please, if you notice anything that needs correcting, _tell me_! It would help me out a lot. 
> 
> Zen and Jumin are my personal favourites, and I sometimes like to (hurt myself) think about how the reset theory might apply to a MC that chooses one of them over Saeyoung! Writing something using a prompt as powerful as this with that sweet angel baby that is Hyun Ryu has been particularly painful... I really couldn't resist haha. Hope you enjoyed that~


End file.
